I'm a teacher. So I tend to put things off until the summer when I have time to breathe. After a year of shots, pills, ultrasounds, acupuncture needles, horrible herbs, and tears, I made an appointment with an RE in June of 2013. She looked over my history. She immediately decided to order blood tests. Egg count, hormone levels, chromosome makeup (my dad is adopted so there are some holes in my medical history). She also did another vaginal ultrasound. My right ovary and tube looked great. Apparently my ovary resembled a chocolate chip cookie. This is good because you can see all the follicles. My left side wasn't so clear and was enough to cause concern. So she ordered a HSG. They inject dye through the cervix and do an xray scan to see the shape of the uterus and fallopian tubes. I said sign me up. Whatever helps right?
When I went in for my HSG, all my blood work was back. Completely normal hormone levels, no markers for genetic disease, and excellent egg quantity. So far so good. On to the HSG. I'm not trying to scare anyone, but I'm a straight shooter. This was one of the worst experiences of my life. I have never experienced this kind of pain. My doc uses a cervical block which means she takes a NEEDLE and injects numbing medication into the cervix. That was NOT fun! The entire procedure took about 5 minutes and I felt every second of it. But finally, an answer. My right side looked textbook perfect. My uterus also perfect. But I had a hydrosalpinx (sp?). My left fallopian tube was twisted and swollen. She couldn't see an opening or an ovary. Her suggestion? Surgery. I would probably lose the tube. However, plenty of women go on to have successful pregnancies after an ectopic pregnancy where they lose a tube. Not all hope was lost.
The surgery was scheduled for a month later. It was laproscopy. What was supposed to take an hour took 2 1/2. Turns out my left tube had completely twisted/wrapped around itself. Somewhere in that twisting, it seemed to swallow up the left ovary because after an house of looking, she still couldn't find it. And to add to that, it had adhered itself to my abdominal wall. While the doc wanted to remove the tube, she found that in all the acrobatics, the tube had twisted with my ureter. Yeah let's not remove that. So she cauterized my left tube. I was down for about a week. But I got some awesome color photos of my lady parts.
After the surgery and after the drugs wore off, I started to research. Apparently we all have fluid in our tubes at some point in the month. It flows out the ovary end and into the your body. No biggie. Because my tube was closed on the ovary end, that fluid was flowing back into my uterus. I found several studies that said this can cause a whole mess of issues. First, the fluid can create a barrier in your uterus so the egg can't implant. Second, the fluid can wash the egg right out. Third, the fluid can create a change in your uterine contractions. Look into this if you have a hydrosalpinx. It's really fascinating. So with that problem removed would we have success?
Monday, October 21, 2013
The Medical Murkiness
Hal and I have been together for 13 years. When we were young and stupid...really stupid...we decided to try to get pregnant. I was 18 and he was 23. One month of continual sex on teenage libido was all it took. Bam! Pregnant. Was I on prenatals? No. Did I even go to the doc? No. So no great surprise that I mc'd (miscarried) at around 7 weeks. Fortunately, no D&C. At first, I didn't think it would effect me. However, the fact that the baby came out whole and visible is something that still haunts me to this day. I was depressed and constantly in tears. It took me weeks to recover. And to be honest, dear reader, I'm not sure if anyone ever recovers from that. I still think about it.
After the mc, I sought solace in the internet. I didn't feel like Hal understood what I was going through. I felt alone. So I joined a message board for women who had been through my same ordeal, some of them several times. I was lost in the language (mc, dd, dh, ds, bd, bfn, bfp, opk, ti, iui, etc). Because of that, I try to always explain my abbreviations. I soon lost interest in the message board as I felt like it was causing me to dwell and not move on. Over time, I came to realize that the mc was probably a blessing in disguise. I was nowhere near equipped to have a child at that time. Though I would have loved him or her and done the best I could.
So flash forward 10 unprotected years later. Stupidly I thought we were just REALLY good at the whole rhythm method thing. We finally decide in Spring of 2012 that we are ready for a family. I thought I might need a little help. Come on, 10 yrs?! So I went to my gyno who said I was probably suffering from anovulation. I just wasn't releasing that little egg. So he puts me on 50 mg of Clomid. Progesterone test says no luck. I'm moved to 100 mg. No luck. I'm moved to 150 mg. Progesterone level at 13.7. So I ovulated dear reader but it wasn't very impressive. Next month at 150, no luck. The doc decides to move onto the HCG trigger shot. For those that don't know, they have you take the Clomid and then monitor you with vaginal ultrasounds (joy and fun). When they see a good follicle, they trigger you with a shot in your rumpus. For 98% of women this will ensure a good ovulation. Guess who is in that unlucky 2? Yes the Eggo family indeed. After 3 months of triggering and only 1 month actually working, my doc threw in the towel and referred me to an RE (reproductive endocrinologist).
I couldn't accept the RE. I couldn't accept that I might actually have to endure fertility treatments to conceive. So I put the RE on the back burner. I decided to try an all natural approach. I went to an acupuncturist. Who told me point blank I was too fat and gave me an alkaline diet to try. I actually enjoyed the diet. Research says the more plant protein and vegetables you eat the more fertile you are. Look it up. I also got up off my lazy ass and joined a gym. I got a trainer and lost 15 or so pounds. I have to tell you, after months of heartache and depression, I think the working out saved my life. I finally had an outlet. I was doing something proactive that I could actually see working. And my acupuncturist started to notice too. After several months of having needles in my ears and forehead, electrified needles in my stomach, and drinking "herb tea" that looked and tasted exactly like mud, I still had no success. I knew the time had come. It was time to call the RE.
After the mc, I sought solace in the internet. I didn't feel like Hal understood what I was going through. I felt alone. So I joined a message board for women who had been through my same ordeal, some of them several times. I was lost in the language (mc, dd, dh, ds, bd, bfn, bfp, opk, ti, iui, etc). Because of that, I try to always explain my abbreviations. I soon lost interest in the message board as I felt like it was causing me to dwell and not move on. Over time, I came to realize that the mc was probably a blessing in disguise. I was nowhere near equipped to have a child at that time. Though I would have loved him or her and done the best I could.
So flash forward 10 unprotected years later. Stupidly I thought we were just REALLY good at the whole rhythm method thing. We finally decide in Spring of 2012 that we are ready for a family. I thought I might need a little help. Come on, 10 yrs?! So I went to my gyno who said I was probably suffering from anovulation. I just wasn't releasing that little egg. So he puts me on 50 mg of Clomid. Progesterone test says no luck. I'm moved to 100 mg. No luck. I'm moved to 150 mg. Progesterone level at 13.7. So I ovulated dear reader but it wasn't very impressive. Next month at 150, no luck. The doc decides to move onto the HCG trigger shot. For those that don't know, they have you take the Clomid and then monitor you with vaginal ultrasounds (joy and fun). When they see a good follicle, they trigger you with a shot in your rumpus. For 98% of women this will ensure a good ovulation. Guess who is in that unlucky 2? Yes the Eggo family indeed. After 3 months of triggering and only 1 month actually working, my doc threw in the towel and referred me to an RE (reproductive endocrinologist).
I couldn't accept the RE. I couldn't accept that I might actually have to endure fertility treatments to conceive. So I put the RE on the back burner. I decided to try an all natural approach. I went to an acupuncturist. Who told me point blank I was too fat and gave me an alkaline diet to try. I actually enjoyed the diet. Research says the more plant protein and vegetables you eat the more fertile you are. Look it up. I also got up off my lazy ass and joined a gym. I got a trainer and lost 15 or so pounds. I have to tell you, after months of heartache and depression, I think the working out saved my life. I finally had an outlet. I was doing something proactive that I could actually see working. And my acupuncturist started to notice too. After several months of having needles in my ears and forehead, electrified needles in my stomach, and drinking "herb tea" that looked and tasted exactly like mud, I still had no success. I knew the time had come. It was time to call the RE.
Sunday, October 20, 2013
Basic Background
I thought before I get into the meat and potatoes, I would give you the 411 on me and my partner. For blog world sake we'll call me Amee Eggo and my husband Hal Eggo. Me: 30, (well in a month) high school teacher, no obvious medical issues, (seriously, not even a cavity) only child. Hal: 36, dispatcher, only medical issue is a slightly elevated blood pressure for which he is medicated, has 4 siblings. Neither of us drink, smoke, use drugs (ok twice last year but what's a little pot between friends?) We live in Texas. We have been married for almost 12 years. Parents to 1 fur baby, Emily our 11 year old chihuahua. And a rather feisty dart frog named Fedora. We run, eat healthy, take vitamins, and get to bed at a reasonable time. We have been TTC (trying to conceive) for 18 months.
Fertility issues...Hal: none! The first sperm analysis done said he had low morphology (weird shaped little suckers). After a second test was done our RE (reproductive endocrinologist) said this wasn't a concern. After months of worry, we find out this isn't a concern. Sheesh, I needed another straw added on my back here. Thanks a lot first doc.
Me: anovulation (I don't ovulate on my own) There are other issues, but I'll save that for tomorrow's post as I am fading fast here dear reader.
We tried the natural method for a couple of months but decided we needed some help.
Tomorrow....the long road paved with white coats.
Good night dear reader.
Fertility issues...Hal: none! The first sperm analysis done said he had low morphology (weird shaped little suckers). After a second test was done our RE (reproductive endocrinologist) said this wasn't a concern. After months of worry, we find out this isn't a concern. Sheesh, I needed another straw added on my back here. Thanks a lot first doc.
Me: anovulation (I don't ovulate on my own) There are other issues, but I'll save that for tomorrow's post as I am fading fast here dear reader.
We tried the natural method for a couple of months but decided we needed some help.
Tomorrow....the long road paved with white coats.
Good night dear reader.
Introduction
Why am I writing this? Why would I want to relive what I am about to write here? Maybe it's my masochistic tendencies....nah. I'm writing this because like millions of women, (and hopefully some are reading this) I am infertile. You know, I think that's the first time in almost 2 years that I've openly said that. I am infertile. And it sucks. And because it is one of the few remaining taboos in our society, (and I love pushing the envelope) I started this blog.
While none of this makes any sense to me, I have decided to relive my journey in the hopes that someone out there will maybe not be completely be comforted by these words, but at least feel comfort that they are not alone. Even if someone reading this just feels better knowing that someone else out there feels the way they do, this will be worth it.
I would like to share with you dear reader. I would like to share everything from start to finish. From emotions to medical discoveries to victories and more commonly fails, I want you to know. I want someone out there to know my journey because it's likely your journey too. Read on dear readers. Read on!
While none of this makes any sense to me, I have decided to relive my journey in the hopes that someone out there will maybe not be completely be comforted by these words, but at least feel comfort that they are not alone. Even if someone reading this just feels better knowing that someone else out there feels the way they do, this will be worth it.
I would like to share with you dear reader. I would like to share everything from start to finish. From emotions to medical discoveries to victories and more commonly fails, I want you to know. I want someone out there to know my journey because it's likely your journey too. Read on dear readers. Read on!
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